HEATH LEDGER
BRAD RENFRO
BOBBIE FISHER
wtf? stop dying, you guys.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Monday, January 21, 2008
I Don't Know Much, But...
I know this...
You shouldn't lose on your home field when your home field advantage is that its -23 degrees and the other team is freezing to death when you play in that weather all the time and the opposing team's kicker blows a gimme kick and you have the most seasoned QB in all of football and Shemp Manning's throwing hand is a block of ice and a trip to the SuperBowl is on the line.
I ain't sayin'...I'm just sayin'.
You shouldn't lose on your home field when your home field advantage is that its -23 degrees and the other team is freezing to death when you play in that weather all the time and the opposing team's kicker blows a gimme kick and you have the most seasoned QB in all of football and Shemp Manning's throwing hand is a block of ice and a trip to the SuperBowl is on the line.
I ain't sayin'...I'm just sayin'.
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Movie Review in 10 Words or Less
Cloverfield.
Innovative, interesting. Don't expect resolution, just sequels.
Prediction for opening weekend: $55-$60 million.
Innovative, interesting. Don't expect resolution, just sequels.
Prediction for opening weekend: $55-$60 million.
Friday, January 18, 2008
5 things I'd do with $50 billion dollars
Bill Gates is worth just shy of $50 billion dollars. I can live quite well on only $1 billion (i'm frugal that way) so here are 5 things i'd do with the change.
1. Change my name to Tom Brady's Penis, so when i make charitable donations and build hospitals, some stuffy suit will have to announce that "this new Obstetrics Center was made possible by Tom Brady's Penis". He'd sue but, hey, i can afford it.
2. Sponsor the best NASCAR team and plaster my new name all over it.
3. Buy Trump organization just so I could fired the Donald.
4. Manufacture and sell the ugliest car known to mankind, but then price it at a dollar so everyone will still buy it.
5. Buy several plots of land in every state along I-40 and put statues of myself (well-muscled and nude of course) on the plots. Maybe I will make each one slightly different from the last so if you drive by fast enough, it looks like I'm moving.
1. Change my name to Tom Brady's Penis, so when i make charitable donations and build hospitals, some stuffy suit will have to announce that "this new Obstetrics Center was made possible by Tom Brady's Penis". He'd sue but, hey, i can afford it.
2. Sponsor the best NASCAR team and plaster my new name all over it.
3. Buy Trump organization just so I could fired the Donald.
4. Manufacture and sell the ugliest car known to mankind, but then price it at a dollar so everyone will still buy it.
5. Buy several plots of land in every state along I-40 and put statues of myself (well-muscled and nude of course) on the plots. Maybe I will make each one slightly different from the last so if you drive by fast enough, it looks like I'm moving.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Pros and Cons
for the Candidates.
Hillary
Pro: Fewer scandals. Because a stain on a young man's trousers means nothing.
Con: Would you let your airplane pilot's wife fly the jet just because she was married to him?
Obama
Pro: All the "White" House jokes
Con: Have to give all his speeches from a bulletproof bubble, a la the Pope.
Fred
Pro: Hottest 1st Lady EVER!
Con: " Im not a real leader, but I play one on TV"
Huckabee
Pro: Chuck Norris will be the most kick ass Sec. of Defense imaginable.
Con: Instead of income tax refunds, every one gets paid in Total Gyms and copies of Missing in Action.
Mitt
Pro: Most original name for a President. Who says he's not about change.
Con: Missouri may become our Nation's capital.
McCann
Pro: He'll punch other world leaders in the nuts if they dont listen to reason.
Con: See "Pro"
Hillary
Pro: Fewer scandals. Because a stain on a young man's trousers means nothing.
Con: Would you let your airplane pilot's wife fly the jet just because she was married to him?
Obama
Pro: All the "White" House jokes
Con: Have to give all his speeches from a bulletproof bubble, a la the Pope.
Fred
Pro: Hottest 1st Lady EVER!
Con: " Im not a real leader, but I play one on TV"
Huckabee
Pro: Chuck Norris will be the most kick ass Sec. of Defense imaginable.
Con: Instead of income tax refunds, every one gets paid in Total Gyms and copies of Missing in Action.
Mitt
Pro: Most original name for a President. Who says he's not about change.
Con: Missouri may become our Nation's capital.
McCann
Pro: He'll punch other world leaders in the nuts if they dont listen to reason.
Con: See "Pro"
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
The Blog Part 2: Return to the Revenge of the Son of the Blog
well its been a long time kiddies. i had to lay low for a minute to let Mrs. Loblaw apply for a job. as all faithful readers know, this is not the kind of thing you want potential employers to read (teehee).
Man oh man, too much has happened since we last spoke.
A woman and a black man are running for President! My God, this has never happened...well, not since 1872 when Vicki Woodhull and Frederick Douglass ran. But forget that. I like both these candidates but is mainstream America ready? I mean, even if one of them ends up as VP, they're only a stray bullet away from being POTUS. Will we really take that chance? I'm all about electing the person who's most qualified. I just don't think enough people are. I mean, Kennedy winning was a big deal because he was Catholic, for Christ's sake! and a Mormon thinks he has a chance? anyone who believes Missouri is the promised land should never be allowed to talk to leaders of other countries.
I have withdrawn my IIED claim against my daughter. we have settled out of court for an undisclosed amount and i am under contract not to discuss the details.
I could go on and on... so i will.
the Law Office of Bob Loblaw has changed location and i am now the only managing partner. Pro: all the money comes to me. Con: all the bills come to me.
I have officially gotten old. Music is a little louder, things hang a bit lower, i need sleep, i don't understand nor am i really attracted to Fergie, and i have foregone cheap beer and wet t-shirts for good scotch and trash TV. someone get me a Rascal.
Everyone go out and see No Country for Old Men and buy Superbad on DVD.
I have to get to work now, as it all falls on me. No workie, no eatie.
I shall return
Man oh man, too much has happened since we last spoke.
A woman and a black man are running for President! My God, this has never happened...well, not since 1872 when Vicki Woodhull and Frederick Douglass ran. But forget that. I like both these candidates but is mainstream America ready? I mean, even if one of them ends up as VP, they're only a stray bullet away from being POTUS. Will we really take that chance? I'm all about electing the person who's most qualified. I just don't think enough people are. I mean, Kennedy winning was a big deal because he was Catholic, for Christ's sake! and a Mormon thinks he has a chance? anyone who believes Missouri is the promised land should never be allowed to talk to leaders of other countries.
I have withdrawn my IIED claim against my daughter. we have settled out of court for an undisclosed amount and i am under contract not to discuss the details.
I could go on and on... so i will.
the Law Office of Bob Loblaw has changed location and i am now the only managing partner. Pro: all the money comes to me. Con: all the bills come to me.
I have officially gotten old. Music is a little louder, things hang a bit lower, i need sleep, i don't understand nor am i really attracted to Fergie, and i have foregone cheap beer and wet t-shirts for good scotch and trash TV. someone get me a Rascal.
Everyone go out and see No Country for Old Men and buy Superbad on DVD.
I have to get to work now, as it all falls on me. No workie, no eatie.
I shall return
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
